Member Since 2017
Stalker-ish. Normal people dont show up at people's workplaces after being ignored.
People will always find fault. You are who you are, and thats not defineable. People get drunk, and you recognize improvement in yourself going towards where you want to be. Focus on that. No one else matters. We become what we fill the void with.
Go ahead. When you get raped and abused, emotionally tortured. and have a "pimp", you will be estranged from your family. You will be a slave, without your consent. Go ahead and glamorize the lifestyle. Easy come easy go. Even the cops wont be able to help you, because there will be no proof that it wasnt done without your consent. This is how people get into human traficking. If you really want to get into this career path go look it up. If you value your life, research the field like you would any other job. It is so upsetting when I see girls willing to become a puppet and are excited by the opportunity. Why not have a healthy relationship with a boy your age? Instead of a pedophile?
Jeez. Thats a lot of self shaming. Whatever you did, people have done far worse than you. You cant time travel so it may help to accept what the past has been. Grudges for yourself or others will only tear away at your relationship with yourself. There is no point to obsess over our mistakes. Which may or may not have even done any harm, Im sure no one else thinks of your mistakes as often as you do unless they are toxic people. I highly recommend you get a CBT app for your device. There are many free ones. It helps you challenge your beliefs and such thought patterns.
Probably tell your friend and then call a distress line. I would recommend kids help phone if you have that in your country.
These arent just for suicide. Sometimes things like this happen and you need someone to talk to and help you deal. If it doesnt work try 9-1-1 or whatever emergency line you have and the operator will connect you to the right service. Or sometimes call 0 for operator.