Things need to be reciprocated. Thats the truth of it. I can't figure out whether they truly are. My intuition says no at times, but I sometimes feel like I doubt people who are trustworthy. There's a lot of factors. Maybe I should step back and let things happen. Let them fall into or out of place. I cant convince someone to reach for their goals. If they arent taking actions maybe it's because they have doubts. Sometimes I do too. No judgement. But someday I will run out of patience or stop caring. I'm close to that these days.
I cant help wondering why you feel love for me. I sometimes feel like it's not because you see any value in me other than what I give you. Im tired of being mother teresa. I love you but seriously what value do you see? "You're amazing you make me laugh I like spending time with you". Thats it? Generic adjectives. You dont see any value in me. Im not special to you other than for what i give to you that others dont.