So after a very lengthy call with my friend who disappeared to the East to take some personal time to sort out some of his BS, I was exhausted but happy to finally hear from him, considering with the attitude he left with I figured he might’ve ended up in a ditch somewhere. But nope, he’s doing great from what I can tell.

Anyway, I fall asleep and the dream begins.

I’m at the house I’m currently renting at, only it’s different. The layout inside was completely changed and the backyard extended for a quarter of a mile going downhill to the guest house in the very back. I’m walking down the path leading to the guesthouse when I see the two people who currently live there come outside. But more importantly, I notice this giant unicycle with flame decals along the frame. So as I’m talking to these people, I pick up the unicycle and try to figure out how to ride it. Something to note, I’ve never even touched a unicycle before. So I’m trying to jump on it and can’t balance out, and I look at the two people and tell them, “Maybe I should move to the grass so I don’t split my head open when I fall.”

I can remember walking towards the grass with the unicycle, and then next thing I know I’m back at the front of the main house and both the two people who were with me and the unicycle were gone.

I walk into the house and this is when I notice how different it is from the real thing. Of course I don’t realize this in the dream though because I don’t know I’m dreaming.

When I walk in I see the two people from outside on a very long couch that covers the living room wall, two Asians guys, and a very pretty Asian girl caked up like a geisha. They’re all playing a nonexistent version of MvC and ask if I want to play, and me being the fighting game fanatic that I am, I say yes. I remember most of the fights but I’m just going to skip to the last one because that’s where things started to fall apart.

So after beating everyone I played, the Asian girl grabs the control and says we’re doing a final match, 3v3, winner take all. We both hit the “Random” function and get random characters and the match begins. My first guy is some dude in a robe with a staff, I don’t remember hers, but I demolish her first two characters with this guy. When her third characters comes out, I bring out a different guy, who happens to be The Thing from the Fantastic Four.

At this point we’re no longer playing on the tv, but the couch had turned into a screen of sorts and are characters were jumping around on the cushions while they fought. All the other people who were in the room originally were now gone, and it was just me and her, but i could still hear them talking and rooting even though they weren’t there.

I end up activating my level 3 super on her and completely destroy her last character, only I never see him get hit by it. When I look up at her she sticks her tongue out and shoots me a dirty look before walking away, but I’m still looking for her character on the couch. And as I’m looking this outline of an invisible something starts running towards my character. I think, “What the f**k is that?” and reach “into” the couch and grab it to find that it’s a little leopard.

And as I grab it, it starts biting my finger and it f*****g hurts, so I hurl the little bastard on the floor and it runs away. When I look back up at the couch I can see something under the blanket on the headrest. Maybe it’s her character? So I lift it up and see my dads dog, only it’s been ripped in half with its guts spilling out on the cushion and it’s making this god awful noise, like someone trying to yell when their throat is full of liquid, this garbled f*****g horrific noise. But for whatever reason I’m not phased by any of this, it’s like she’s always been that way, so I put the blanket back over her.

I give up on looking for her character and turn around to leave. I walk along the living room, exit the front door, and head back towards the guest house, only the path now has this slide next to it instead of just grass. It appears to just go to the bottom of the hill, so I sit down and start to slide my way down. But halfway down the slide just drops into this tunnel, and it’s steep, practically completely vertical. I’m flying down, faster and faster as it gets darker and darker. I’m slamming my hands and nails against the wall trying to stop but it’s a useless attempt. I can feel my skin and nails getting ripped off as they slid against the walls as I continue to plunge faster and faster down this void.

And then, at what I would guess to be the very bottom of this slide, when I can see something resembling an exit, I wake up. I wake up, drive to work, and on my drive I begin to remember all this s**t from my dream, and once I get to work, I start writing this before my day starts.

And now that the clock has hit 9:00, I’m wasting the companies dime, and with that, I wish you a happy Friday.

Until next time.