Just another noone.

Whenever I see a secret that asks people to list members for something, I really get upset that my username is never ever on it. Which members are loved or missing? Which members are most this or that? My name has never ever come up on it. It's not like I don't or didn't post quite a bit. I'm a regular member. So, I wasted a year and a half on this fucking site just to have people not even remember me one little bit? I didn't make any impression just because I refused to be cliquey and fake niceness to everyone?

It steams me up. I've done some of my best work on this site. Then some half pint comes along and writes some boring drivel written in miserable English, or copies other people's work, and everyone's all over it. If it ever comes out that I post some of the most offensive and horrid stuff on here, is there really any wonder why?
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anonymous user
As much as being anon can be.
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anonymous user
It's been real.
This has been a long chit chat. I need to get on with everything else I was supposed to do today. Thanks again for handing out some attention I didn't really deserve today.
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anonymous user
I honestly probably know who you are and let it slide because I'm not above giving my friends or respected members leeway.
I'm not big on moderating. Some of what gets deleted annoys me quite a bit, but I just get a kick out of the melodrama. I'm surprised that nothing I have ever posted ever has been deleted by a moderator yet. Maybe I'm not as offending as I think I am.
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anonymous user
And there is also no way to make everyone happy. Some people want a mod with a heavy hand waiting to dish out deletion at the drop of a hat. Others want complete laxity and not even a hint of moderation.

Eh.
That makes sense to be worried about that, especially since there is someone on this site that claims to be making bombs and selling them. It could be bull, but my gut tells me it's not.
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anonymous user
They make me worried about society. First, flood the page at secrettalk, next, terrorist attacks.

It's a logical progression.
NoLikeLies has some sort of itch to scratch or something to prove. The flooding troll is the type of troll that scares me, actually. They make me worried about bandwidth.
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anonymous user
Eh. It's not all that hard to empty the site of the floods. Press a button a few times.

It's really that the troll didn't get any attention from their parents as kids, so they want to be babied by an authority figure. I happen to fit the bill.
Speaking of flooding the website, it looks like you have your hands full right now.
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anonymous user
Some of the trolls obviously have other usernames. Some of them are a special kind of troll who seem to magically come out at the perfect time to say something tactless and clever. NoLikeLies for instance. I've seen them magically appear during arguments.
I suppose you can call me a troll now, too. I'm not like the ones that flood the site with pages of duplicate posts or comments. I don't write directionless hate, either. I just attack and be on my way, or I stay and argue if I incense someone.
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anonymous user
There are a number of members I really don't like and I am convinced just troll the place in their own special way. Ethan, Olivez, me on occasion.

There is also several trolls who follow me around. Apparently I'm an awful person or something.
I don't think he is. I find him very fake indeed and I suspect him for a few things on this site.
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anonymous user
I've told him this before. He is an accepted troll. He has nothing at all worth saying inside of him. While some of the things he says are clever and funny, I doubt he is coming up with them on his own.
Ethan is a permanent troll who isn't looked upon as a troll by other members, yes?
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anonymous user
I cherish the times I can find intelligent conversation, especially in the myriad of bullshit you find on this site. I blame Ethan.
I want to thank you for your time and attention.
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anonymous user
What do you want to do?
This could lead into a whole new discussion into the definition of love. I don't want to do that. I found those types of discussions to be very dizzying and annoying by the time I reached college.
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anonymous user
That depends entirely on what you have accepted love as.
"Love can never be truly accepted simply as it is if one isn't happy."

I'm happy, then, according to this.
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anonymous user
Truth can be accepted easily in any form if one is happy. Love can never be truly accepted simply as it is if one isn't happy.

You apparently have come to the conclusion that happiness comes from external means. I blame society. I often entertain the same ideas. This is a false way of thinking. Many of us in the western world feel so detached from everything around us. This is because from a young age we are pressured to be independent. We have to have or own means of transportation, our own houses, our own money. In this we have come to the conclusion that it is us against the world. This isn't at all true. We are all connected. Every little action leads way to another and another and another.

If you act with love, then love will reverberate through the world. If you act out of selfishness, then selfishness will reverberate through the world.

There is also a notion that one person can not change the world. This isn't true either. One person can change their own world. We each have a small piece of the world all to ourselves. This is your consciousness. You can change that at will. Nothing is set in stone.
I don't think they are connected to happiness. Especially truth. So many truths are unpleasant. Love can bring about happiness, but you can endure hardships in love that make you anything but happy. As for faith, I did say that I had insatiable hope.
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anonymous user
I don't claim to be able to compare myself to him. I also am only human, like the rest of us. I offer grand ideals from a great, great man in order to help you the way he has helped me, which was to see that my being an asshole is wrong. Even if I do it, I know very well that it is wrong and will serve no purpose but to make me less happy in the end. I strive every day to be more compassionate and less of an asshole. I fail sometimes. I try to do better next time.

Love and truth? How do you expect to find these without happiness? Without virtue? Without faith?
I think they are all interconnected.
Love and truth. Those I want more than happiness.

You know what you wrote in that long comment below? Earlier you said you sometimes act like an asshole. So why write of the simple ideas of your Dalai Lama expecting it to make a damn bit of difference to me, when you yourself admit to acting like an asshole on this site?
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anonymous user
Such as?
I'm not on a downwards spiral. I just have greater wants in life than to be happy.
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anonymous user
It seems to me that you enjoy being miserable, and by acting out of misery you exacerbate your misery. As someone who loves misery, continuing in a downward spiral would be ideal, I think.
You gathered that I'm living in a downwards spiral from what I wrote? Wow.
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anonymous user
I wrote that myself using ideas I borrowed from His Holiness The Dalai Lama. I don't expect you to change. I just wanted you to understand some simple ideas. Feel free to keep complaining and to continue to be miserable. Feel free to continue life as a continuous downward spiral. There's nothing I can do but be compassionate and offer this, a moment of my time, to try and share with you what has been inspiring and fulfilling to me.
I hope you copied and pasted that. You wrote in there that you can't make people act a certain way. You aren't going to change how I act by what you have written. I don't share your opinions. The one thing I want out of life isn't to be happy. Do you ever see how some people love to be miserable? I have seemed to make more people happy out of acting out of spite than when I've acted out of Light and love.
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anonymous user
Negative feelings in no way give right to negative action. Everyone on this planet has one thing they want out of life. To be happy. The only right we are instilled with from birth is the right to attain that happiness. If you are going to hinder others from attaining theirs because you didn't find it in quite the way you thought you would then you are in the wrong, and you will never be happy.

We are all interconnected as a human race. Our actions are dependently originated from the actions of others and vice versa. We must accept, however, that we can not make other people act in any certain way. All we can do is act in a positive manner ourselves. By acting out of compassion and selflessness we make the world a better place by spreading a bit of light and a bit of happiness to the people around us. By acting out of anger or sadness or any other powerful negative emotion we are only in turn making our dark emotions that much more powerful, and so they will never cease to plague us. We also reiterate the cycle of hate. You know how bad it feels to be ignored and stepped on, and yet you give it freely like you are some final judge.

There are billions of other souls in this world and all they desire is to be happy. You are one of them. Open yourself up, free yourself of petty grudges, give yourself to the notion of selflessness and you will find the happiness you seek.

I stay because I simply have insatiable hope. And I've invested too much of my time and efforts on this website to simply leave it behind. I do resent that all it bought me is being ignored. I have a grudge, so I feel in my right to alleviate my tension here.
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anonymous user
I'll leave when I decide I've had enough. I'll leave when the site stops entertaining me. I'll leave when I find something better to do.

You didn't answer my question, though. What are you going to get out of staying to the bitter end?

When you could just leave now and put all this resentment and unnecessary stress behind you.
A lot of people aren't happy either and are waiting in the wings. I've seen them come out from time to time to express how they miss the site from how it was before I even came here. They were a community, too. And, if this ST keeps on going, I can safely say that you'll see this site as it is now change like I did. Will you leave?
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anonymous user
A lot of people are happy with the way things are. I'd have to say that they outnumber you.

This is, after all, a community.

The only person who could end this site is the administrator and he seems pretty okay with the way things are going. If he's not he doesn't seem to voice his opinion very strongly or at all.

By saying 'offensive and horrid' things you aren't really helping things get back to the fabled way things used to be. I think I can safely say that things won't resort back to that and that this site won't be disappearing any time soon. Are you really willing to sit here and suffer through this?

For what?
I'm waiting for it to turn back to the site it was long before you even joined. When it wasn't all about people looking for friends and socializing. Some of it was, mind you. Indirectly. But there were still more secrets than incessant chatting. I'm waiting for it to turn back into a secrets site again. Or I'm waiting for the site's end.
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anonymous user
Well, maybe other people have found your material as nothing they had any input to give on. Maybe it's not about the username, but about the context.

Consider the source. Think about the people on this website. Do you think they could feasibly give you any useful feedback on your problems?

Many of the people here are looking for friends and many of them find them. Some people don't and they leave in search of better things. You've apparently stuck around. If you don't like the site and it only makes you feel bad why you are still posting here on a regular basis?
I still have responded to whatever secrets I felt I could have some input on. It's not that I don't like everyone. It's just that I concentrate on what is written, not the username until I what I am most interested in keeps having the same username attached to it, and only a handful stand out as people that I would befriend personally.

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anonymous user
Then you're probably not going to get any attention from everyone or most of the members because they don't know you or have any interest in you.

Why do you want attention from people you don't like?
I refuse to socialize with everyone or even most of the members. That would be fake for me to do. Only a handful or less of the members on this site interest me on an individual level.
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anonymous user
I won't. List some members who aren't memorable and who wouldn't be on anyone's list. I guess I'd be on that list somewhere maybe.
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anonymous user
I rarely fake niceness to the patrons of SecretTalk. Sometimes I'm a complete asshole.

I also am not really all that cliquey. I talk to everyone. There have even been people in the past who came on here and pretty much only talked to me. I try my damnedest to comment on other people's stuff and socialize. I've made personal connections with people outside of this website.

I've also posted a lot of stuff that didn't get any comments. I adapted in some cases and let it slide in others. If A and B doesn't work, try something new.
well you can become popular but then you'll be trolled and most likely called worthless or a whore or you can stay in the shadows and let your secrets out with not as much mean-ness
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DevilsAngel
Can you just tell us. :/

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Yergurl23
It won't work because I've tried calling attention to my lack of attention plenty of times, in a few different ways with my username. I was never even read.

Yes, I'm taking it personally. I'm ignored just as intensely in real life, too.
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anonymous user
Why wouldn't that work..
I think it would.
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Yergurl23
That doesn't mean I can't sympathize. I've been ignored in many places in my life. Even, now get this, in real life. Which is much worse than on a website.

I think, though, you're taking it too personally.

Yeah, I do get a lot of attention on this website. Most of it is really negative and harsh. Can I assume that some of it is from you?

I say it's a mixed blessing.
No, that wouldn't work.
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anonymous user
Maybe if you told "us" who you are, then you wouldnt be ignored so much
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TQAD
Not really. But you wouldn't know what the hell I'm talking about anyhow. You've never been ignored on this site.
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anonymous user
Is the only reason you posted to get your name in lights?
Hmm.
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Yergurl23