I am 15 and forever alone. I have never had a boyfriend in my life. I have fallen in love deeply once with an um . wateringHOLE! My life is a joke I am a joke, I'm sure if I commited suicide everyone would persue his life normally, well nothing major its not like a celebrity's death or even one of their breakups . I am no body, I have friends but they hang out with me to fill the empty space and they are willing to replace me if I walk away, I have a habbit of choosing rotten friends, but I have a really bright future - if I. Survived the tempting sucidal thoughts-. I could get my master degree and PH from germany, and persue my education there. I want to be a writer , to portray the animated emotions of mine on using a pen, the thoughts lingering like doodling art into the deep blue sea of endless words. Once I start I can't stop, it's the only thing I seem to be good at . I am academically smart and I see a long route with every ambition of mine to , flickering like small silvering sparks to illuminate my path. I am nice but indeed so emotional. I am dying to experiance love, kisses ,hugs, late night talks I just need too feel that someone is affraid to lose me . Movies like the vow corrupted my brain. I need to open up and socialize more.