When I was young my younger sister excelled as a student and seemed to try very little to do so well. I struggled so I had low self esteem and eventually stopped trying to do well when I got into high school because I became depressed. When I got into community college I struggled to try again and got put on academic probation. This was my rock bottom and I realized I needed to try hard and do well. So I did, I started working really hard and got straight As and was the top of all my classes. But I still felt that I could not amount to much so I chose to become a nurse. Being a nurse is wonderful, but I felt called for more so I went back to nurse practitioner school. I am finally in my last semester and my clinical instructors and my preceptors have all said that I am doing better than all their other students and even medical residents they have trained and I feel now that I sold myself short. The American Medical Association hates nurse practitioners as do many doctors and I feel that if I had not thought I was destined for mediocracy in high school and college that I could have and should have done so much more. Then I would be able to help people more and actually be in a profession that is liked and respected. I wish I did not feel this way, I wish the feelings would go away because I will not go back to school again now I just need to accept the way things are. I wanted to share this though so thank you for reading your comments are welcomed.