here's a nutshell: I live in a universe that can be described by my fellow specians from a specific point a long time ago until now. I was born a collection of cells with a neuroelectrical consciousness, and that's still who I am. I am poor, unemployed, single and friendless. I'm also ugly. fortunately I live in a first world country as a citizen. heaven might exist but there is no proof of it, only speculation or imagination. I have a public enemy personality so it pains people to spend time with me, making professional or social success extraordinarily difficult. I downregulated my neurons to the point of making alcohol not enjoyable in the 24 hour picture. looking for work, reading the fluff called fiction, and daydreaming/meditating make my days enjoyable. my life in a nutshell.