Even tho he raped and molested me for 8 years I miss him I just left him a couple months ago and I miss the good times when he was being funny or just messing around he was always full of jokes and I miss my old family they all don't believe me on that side even my brothers who I miss the most and I just want to see them all again but they'll never love me like they used to they don't even bother to answer my calls I'm do tired of living I bet if I was dead people might actually believe me it's crazy how no one believes me cause I'm not broken enough but yet they don't know I have to fight the feeling to kill myself every single day even when I'm numb I don't know if I can continue fighting it I wish they loved me but they believe my dad because he seemed like a good dad around them but when it was just me and him I was always terrified because most of the time he would do stuff but at this point I don't care I just want my family back but if I don't get them back I don't know how long I'll be here well I can barely see the screen so bye for now