How to do it?

I'm living in isolation. I don't know anyone to talk to about this. I have no work because I'm disabled, and there's no work to be found here. My family is all gone a long time ago.

I've tried to kill myself twice this week, but bottled out. I'm not 'crying out for help'. I really just want to get off this roundabout. I'm tired and out of patience with myself and my world around me.

I'm not scared to die, but I am scared of the pain involved. I have no access to any meds to try that way.

Don't want to put anyone on the spot, but can someone give me ideas how to do it? I feel really shitty asking this, but I'm desperate and can't climb out of this very, very dark place. Any anonymous suggestions would be good.

Sorry to everyone else if I'm giving you dark thoughts.
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Echoecho
Something's off about this one.
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Cynic
I just don't understand. Are you confined to a wheelchair or something of that sort? I mean if that's the problem, get a caretaker, they can help you get around. I take care of disabled children and if it weren't for me and my coworkers they would never be able to get out of the house as often as they do.
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SlytherinAngel
I've been reading through the posts on this site and it occurs to me I've misunderstood why you are here. Many of you are asking for help to survive.

I'm sorry if I've upset anyone. I'll try somewhere else. Thank you for your comments.
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Echoecho
Phrazer. Thank you. You sound like a very kind person.
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Echoecho
SlyerinAngel. Thank you. I have a number of good 'friends' online who are good people with real lives they're living. But more recently I've realised that it's maybe these virtual friendships that are only making my own real-life situation and environment bleaker as time goes by. I can't practically get 'out and about' while this location is fairly isolated. I'm tired of looking at 4 walls and a computer screen and I've taken any mirror or reflective surfaces away, because I'm tired at looking at myself. I'm just in a dark hole I don't seem to have the ability to climb out of and my will to continue is basically in shreds.
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Echoecho
I wish that I knew of your particular situation and why you're so very convinced that death is the only plausible way out. It'd be a terrible shame if you threw away your life, when there was still the option of a better future to come. Of course, if death is what you really and truly want, I don't mean to guilt you beforehand. If it's what you really and truly want, not anything I (or anyone else for that matter) could say to stop you.
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phraser
Find a hobby. Talk to people on the internet so you don't feel alone.
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SlytherinAngel
Thank you phrazer. It really isn't that simple in this particular situation. But thank you for your thoughtful comments.
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Echoecho
Although I'm not outrightly against a person's right to end their life, nor even assisted suicide, if the problem is isolation, that's something that can be solved by other means than a common workplace or an untimely end. You can go outside. Involve yourself with the community. Dehermitize yourself through means of volunteer work and recreational group activity. At the very least, you can easily meet people on-line.
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phraser