Anxiety and Love

He's is everything I could ever want- funny, charming, and kind.While I know he really wants me I think between my social anxiety disorder and insecurities, it will destroy everything that we could have had together.I have tried so very hard to be normal as if crowds and people don't bother me but they do.I know I should just be myself but who I am sits in the house, alone dreaming of a life on the outside.

Secretly, when I joke that I'm going to end up the crazy old cat lady- all alone, I mean it.I want to scream and tell him all this but I can't find the words or know what to do.I just wish I didn't feel so scared all the time and that someone would understand.I seriously hope I don't screw this up...
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sohardtobsum1
Thank you guys for the words of encouragement. It makes me feel better to know that other people feel the same way and that I'm not so crazy and alone. I'm going to try and tell him at least some of it, as not overwhelm him on New Year's Eve. And from there we'll see how things go.
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sohardtobsum1
i know exactly what you're going through, except my anxiety disorder and insecurities make me feel like when i am with him and a group of people, or a crowd, i am inadequate compared to those people around us.
maybe someday it will all be fine. I wish i could give you some reassurance, but inside, we are all struggling too.
Maybe he has his own insecurities too, though. Maybe if you reach out and talk to him, you both will find out how similar you are..
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breatheme7
it's all right..i understand. i'm the same; i even joke about being the crazy old cat lady, too. i just wanted to let you know that someday you'll just one day want that change so badly - to reach out to somebody - and just go for it. the same thing happened to me. just don't overthink it, walk up to him and tell him all this. you'll feel so nervous doing it, but when it's over, you should feel better that you finally accomplished it :).
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Ai