You might be too close to see it, but you’ve flipped the self-destruct switch. There’s still time to switch it off, to find yourself somewhere, hiding behind the booze, cigarettes and lies.
I know why you keep going back to that dingy apartment filled with the sweet, acrid smell of cigarette smoke and with lost, angry boys that masquerade as men. It’s because you think that’s all you deserve.You tell me you hate it but you keep going back because you’ve told yourself time and time again that you don’t deserve any better; you’ve told that to yourself so often that it has become your broken reality. You’re worth more than this. You’re not in that dark, smoke-filled living room; you’re only getting more lost every time you try and find yourself there.
You are possibilities.
You are love.
You are hope.
You are a future.
We are the stars; we look down on the world and can only see darkness. What we don’t realize is that we won’t ever find light if we’re looking for it on earth; we’ll only find it when we look to each other, pinpricks of hope in a sea of darkness.
Take the first step out of that dark apartment and into life. Stop keeping secrets in your heart and a bottle of rum under your mattress. You have a chance to stop the self-destruction. You have a chance to silence the voice in your head telling you you’re not worth it. You have a chance to love and be loved. Just take that first step out of the apartment.
You’re not worthless.
You’re not hopeless.
You’re not a failure.
You’re not alone.
You can make it through the pain.
You can make it through the loss.
You are loved.
You are believed in.
You are worth every moment of every day.
You deserve more. Tear down the walls you’ve made out of razor blades, cigarettes, and insecurity. Open your heart to love; believe it when others say you are loved and that you deserve to be loved. Make the change, starting today, to believe in others, believe in love, and believe in yourself. You can still switch off the self-destruct.
I love you.
Believe me when I say it.